Today was a mix of emotions. Makenzie is starting to ask more questions and express some of her feelings regarding how MSD is affecting her sister. It breaks my heart to hear how she hurts and wishes Anna Grace could play with her more. At the same time, my heart hurts for what Anna Grace is going through...I know that Makenzie is her best friend and if she could she would play Barbies, tag, have game nights and snuggle to watch movies with her sister. I have felt this pain for my sweet girls before. I have longed to see them running around the house together, having tea parties, dressing up and playing make believe, playing Barbies, and just be such close sisters. I didn't know how hard it would be to face the day that Makenzie verbalized her hurt and frustrations. These are growing pains as we travel this journey with MSD.
Oh how I thank God for giving Makenzie wisdom, patience and care for Anna Grace. She is so patient and helpful for her. I know He will provide her with all she needs as she matures in her understanding of the beast, MSD. Lord, grant me wisdom in my words as I answer her questions...may my actions and words point her to You and Your loving goodness and kindness.
A little later God began using His hands and little blessings to be the salve on my heart.
- Anna Grace sang a little with me as we were driving. I was singing Jesus Loves Me. I sang, "Yes, Jesus" then paused and she filled in "loves you." It is so cute that she says you because when I sing it I say me so she refers back to me by saying "you".
- Anna Grace, Makenzie and I were invited to have lunch with a special friend who says that Anna Grace is one of the most influential people in her life. What a blessing!
- As we were sitting at home watching a movie, Anna Grace came over and I put her in my lap. She looked at me with such sweetness in her eyes. Then she gave me lots of hugs and sweet "Anna Grace kisses." By the way, Anna Grace doesn't usually sit for very long. So for her to sit and give me kisses was special.
- Anna Grace and I were in the bathroom to brush her teeth. I had her look in the mirror and told her she was so pretty (she likes when I say that to her). She just smiled her sweet smile. Then I would just talk to her in the mirror...at one point, she looked into the mirror and even seemed to point a little to herself and said, "Me"-I do not remember the last time she referred to herself like that.
So, now I will go on to bed and snuggle with Makenzie. She is a little sick tonight so she needs some snuggle time too.
I want to close with a verse that is staying close to my heart lately...